Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Randomize
