So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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