Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
Enjoy the penises
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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