That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Randomize
