I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
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