is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
He uses pillows to masturbate.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize
