At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
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