i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
