your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
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