can we get nightvision for the apartment?
farters have to be the big spoon...
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
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