Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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