i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
