She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Randomize
