OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize