I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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