I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Randomize