thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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