false alarm. still invincible.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
