I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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