i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
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