No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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