Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
My bed is full of blood and feathers
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Randomize
