He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Randomize
