I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
