i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
