Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
