listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
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