Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
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