Dual....:-)
matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
do herpes really smell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
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