I've blown a few things in my day
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
