I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
whose parrot is this?
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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