he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Randomize
