I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
