I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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