I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize