yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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