i don't like sucking hair
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
