Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Randomize
