The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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