If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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