I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
