i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
