Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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