You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
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