I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
