Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Randomize
