..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize