Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
soo... how was my night?
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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