he shaved USA in his pubs
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Randomize
