you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Randomize