I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
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