Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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